Guaranteed Signs You Had Been A 2000s Gay Teenage On Longer Island

Surefire indications you had been A 2000s Gay teenage On Long isle since told by our very own resident extended Island Lesbian,
Dayna Troisi.

Spray tans. MTV’s “Area Raiders.” Having an inexplicable crush on Janis Ian. Piercing your tongue in someone’s cellar enclosed by Happy Bunny posters. Constantly caught between becoming emo and guidette. Getting shoved into lockers.

Each one of these situations form the strangely specific experience of becoming a homosexual teen on
Lawng Island
during the early 2000s. There is definitely anything in water on
Extended Isle
, since there are even more homosexuals than
nail salons
. I am aware this is unbelievable, as suburbia tends to be a conventional wasteland, but that’s what they need you to definitely think. Actually, our company is gay as hell. All my
and greatest pals tend to be queers from the Island of extended.

Very, if not one person else relates to this list, i am aware you spray-tanned, sauce-eating, fist-pumping gays get it. Love and kindly tell the graduating course and go my
insta handle
for the lesbians who escaped their own hometowns and also make more than six numbers today.

Here are 131 indicators that you were an extended Island
homosexual teen
in the 2000s. Indeed, this list is actually loooong because the audience is additional AF– our very own eyelashes and listings tend to be hella lengthy– they do not state “Long isle” for absolutely nothing.


. You’d a GSA inside twelfth grade

Therefore advertised you’re merely an “ally.”

2. You had gay cybersex in AOL chatrooms


3. You had a secret Myspace page

For which you joined up with lesbian groups along with extreme interactions with other queer adolescents littered across The usa.

4. You secretly saw
“The L Word”
and anxiously flipped returning to Nickelodeon each time you heard your mother’s footsteps nearing

Your reflexes were on point with the remote control.

5. You
this dark doll

Longer isle gays are always incredible during sex considering these.

6. You had been suspiciously effective in eating these

7. You believed the longer Island Medium would view you from inside the supermarket and out that your entire household

8. Unattractive
directly ladies
insisted you had a crush on them

As if.

9. You’d an all-consuming crush on a punk elderly

Mine had a fohawk and used security pins as earrings.

10. “The Perks to be A Wallflower” rocked your globe

Plus that second, I swear we had been



11. You used
black lipstick

Because what’s being queer without subverting ~norms~?

12. You used to be darkly obsessed with Sylvia Plath

I am. Im. I will be. GAY.

13. The English teacher ended up being your very best pal



14. Truth Or Dare was actually your chosen sleepover online game

You haven’t lived should you didn’t you will need to bribe your best friend into daring one to kiss your own crush.

15. You used to be inexplicably fired up from the audio of mac ‘n’ cheddar existence stirred

Confess it.

16. You had a wonderful homosexual guy BFF

Which lowkey is far too cool individually now, really works in fashion, and hangs with a bunch of direct models.

17. You couldn’t determine whether you wanted are Avril Lavigne or perform the woman

a wrap seemed dreadful on myself, and so I realize that i recently planned to sleep together.

18. You used to be regarding the
softball staff
, or if you are a classic, unsporty lez like me, the tv series choir

19. You were from the debate staff

And constantly argued pro-choice.

20. You listened to Regina Spektor and Kate Nash

21. You sang an obscure monologue in talent show

Mine had gotten myself suspended.

22. You had key rendezvous during the ladies’ bathroom

No hug will ever measure to the adventure associated with high-school restroom kiss.

23. You took part in “day’s Silence”

As an “ally,” however.

24. You had been


scared of being outed towards moms and dads

I was released to my personal mother at the gyno, because I ridiculously worried she’d inform my personal mommy I got a LESBIAN vagina.

25. You had no gender education and possess never utilized a
dental dam

Sorry to you gender educator ladies exactly who decided to go to Smith university. I guess you shouldn’t sleep with a lengthy isle lez?

26. You decided to go to Warped concert tour or Bamboozle

And dressed in Jac Vanek and TWLOHA jelly necklaces.

27. And asked musical organization people from Cobra Starship to signal yourself elements

Gabe Saporta signed my boob, and my mommy took out my personal AIM account.

28. You saw gay crap on
and stated it absolutely was an accident or for a school job

29. You have gigantic acrylic
because not even homosexuality could possibly get in the form of a lengthy isle women’s charm program

Lesbian fail, but trend winnings.

30. You stained sprinkle brown all-over some sporty lesbians sheets the very first time you hooked up

Sorry about this.

31. You self


had sex inside bra as you happened to be dressed in a bombshell push up bra from Victoria’s key

Our tits looked two dimensions bigger than they actually had been ’cause of those stupid bras. I was a 36E with one, and that I appeared to be a demented pervy comic strip.

32. You anxiously desired to be on
Jersey Shore

33. You didn’t have to lie to go to a lady’s residence

The one thing that means it is far more easy growing up

34. home events happened to be full of belowground homosexual debauchery

The cellar is how the gay shit occurs.

35. You seemed to see if your own ring-finger had been longer than the tip fist to find out if you were really a lesbian

Because you heard it as you covertly saw “The L term.”

36. Or got “in the morning we gay?” quizzes

I unequivocally understood I found myself gay at 13 yrs old because Quizilla told me I was.

37. You


gay content on that dark colored site
Ebaums Community

38. When youtube was actually formulated, you sweatily searched “girls kissing” on your family’s pc in the center of the night

Which brought to…

39. You downloaded porn to Quicktime (this is pre-Pornhub, youngins!)

40. You had to
bring men to prom
, but still slept with a girl that evening

41. You physically fought someone that flirted along with your gf at least once

You’re not from extended isle when you haven’t punched him/her inside the face at Pride.

42. You’re hopelessly in deep love with a
direct lady
exactly who skateboarded

43. You had to attend “religion class”

The highlight of my personal senior school career had been getting fingered inside church bathroom.

44. “All The Things She Said” by t.A.T.u. ended up being the shit

45. You smoked smokes during the coastline in wintertime inside automobile

And thought you were thus cool and alt.

46. You drove 20 minutes or so to visit the drive-thru Dunkin’

And even though there clearly was a walk-in one right down the block.

47. You drove a couple of hours attain Sonic in nj-new jersey

When you haven’t caught on, truth be told there actually wasn’t a lot accomplish.

48. You drove as the only way to obtain fun

Are you presently observing a routine here?

49. You held hearing about LIGALY while knowing you might rather perish than step foot in LIGALY

Also loser closeted teenagers on lengthy isle have actually standards. We desired to party in a dark nightclub, not consume stale donuts in a residential district middle.

50. You owned a Ryan Cassata CD

Which you purchased as he went to the GSA.

51. You h

ad a crush on a lady which went to a catholic college

52. You “hated” the mother but spent each and every day with your mom

Your family codependency is actually genuine.

53. You skipped junior prom

I spent junior prom eating at Friendly’s aided by the different gays.

54. You centered so difficult on the ground in the locker area you nearly decrease over

God forbid a lady believes you’re observing the woman instruction bra.

55. May Die Otherwise Sporting Converse

56. You received tattoos everywhere the human body (because cutting was also severe)

We were too protected and responsive to reduce.

57. You went to Hot Topic after that left since you got intimidated

Because there ended up being constantly a hot dyke operating at register, however just weren’t edgy sufficient for her.

58. You happened to be also too frightened to enter Abercrombie or Hollister

Since it had been dark colored and smelly inside — and because you’re extremely keen on the softball lez greeting adolescents from the home.

59. Which means you purchased rainbow


in the DL at Spencer’s

60. “Hairstyles regarding the Damned” rocked your own globe

Every queer kid peruse this in the bus.

61. So performed “The Catcher Inside Rye”

And thus, you became instructor’s dog.

62. You confided within pet puppy, pet, or hamster

because no body more ~had gotten you~

63. You possessed best friends pendants from Claire’s with a woman you finished up dating

64. You wrote committing suicide notes as a spare time activity

With zero goal of ever before after through, you simply like, required the *release.*

65. You may have a very morbid, dark, and politically inaccurate sense of humor

See 64.

66. You simply can’t sit Personal Justice Warriors.

Long Islanders haven’t any patience for buzzwords.

67. You entirely tend to be unlearning all of your f*cked up prejudices, however.

Becoming homosexual does not get you to exempt from that.

68. You were obsessed with 3oh!3.

Tell your sweetheart, if he states he’s had gotten beef, that I’M A VEGAN, AND THAT I AIN’T F*CKING SCARED OF HIM.

69. You read to flee a grim real life, however you just wound up checking out books about youthful homosexual kids becoming hate-crimed in any event

Or perhaps you happened to be hate-crimed if you are a loser which reads.

70. You utilize “hate criminal activity” as a colloquialism.

71. You bought

a “gay road” sign on the industry day at the metropolis

And hid it within closet.

72. You hung a Pride flag within locker and got a Myspace image with it

73. You had a DeviantArt profile

Mine regrettably nevertheless is out there.

74. You believed extremely seriously you connect to Matthew Shepard and Laramie Wyoming whilst having next to nothing in common with the exception of becoming homosexual

While was the star in “The Laramie Project,” directed by your odd drama teacher.

75. You made insensitive laughs about “The Laramie venture” as if you had beenn’t chuckling, you were weeping.

My personal companion and I also however get hysterical each time we state “the shining lights of Laramie.”

76. You had your own yearbook and guessed the person you believed had been gay as well

77. You were in a love-hate relationship along with your music educators

78. You drastically looked from coach window when it rained

79. You realized every range to lease

NO time simply TODAY.

80. You played 7 Minutes In Heaven at an all-girls sleepover


81. You keep in mind becoming therefore seriously troubled you had beenn’t asked to the all-girls sleepover where you’re CERTAIN they played 7 Minutes In paradise


82. You pretended to be frightened during scary flicks to keep your friend’s hand

Oldest trick within the book, babes.

83. You consumed the sorrows in Elio’s Pizza whenever you had gotten home from softball practice

While there are 10 amazing pizzerias in a two-mile distance of your home.

84. You’d a Nextel walkie talkie phone

Tegan and Sara
had been your faith

86. P!nk

was the distress

Missundaztood nonetheless slaps.

87. You considerably cried in your bed room hearing “Family Portrait”

Though your property existence had been actually fairly amazing as well as your mommy was at the kitchen making sauce while the father was taking walks canine you ~swore~ you’ll resolve.

88. You shared a skateboard around but couldn’t really skate

89. You shared smokes around but failed to actually smoke

We pressured my ex to hold smokes almost everywhere to check tough.

90. You probably did almost anything to prevent gym class

Fortunately, I have a disability. Additional gays was required to increase creative.

100. You mentioned you were bi

Nevertheless happened to be truly homosexual because day is actually long.

101. You decided to go to
Flames Isle
every summer without previously realizing it was gay middle

HOW did I not know I was very near numerous dykes?

102. You entirely knew exacltly what the health teacher was discussing whenever she mentioned this lady roomie

I experienced the largest crush on my health teacher.

103. You wore rainbow sweatbands


104. You spent weekends having around dirty workout equipment in someone’s basement

You had beenn’t cool sufficient to drink in parking lots and that means you consumed close to your mommy’s Gazelle.

105. You obsessively curated the myspace top 8

106. You diverted the attention from the yourself by creating enjoyable of someone else in the locker space


107. You begged your mommy to order you shit from advertisements

108. You binged on terrible treats like Cosmic Brownies and Kool-Aid after school

109. You played those Barbie dress-up games online so you may get their clothing off

You dirty perv.

110. You corrupted your next-door neighbors by simply making all of their Sims flirt with girls

111. You kissed women as a “game” because you had been “acting”

112. You viewed “men You should not Cry” because the only gay material in GSA and happened to be scared back in the cabinet just a little

113. Then chances are you saw “But i am a Cheerleader” and had gotten even more scared

114. If you are happy, you’d one
queer aunt
whom lived-in Ny and provided you wish.

115. You intensely masturbated to MTV music videos

I’ll most likely never forget the first-time We noticed the “Genie In a container” video clip.

116. The cool women who bullied you now have numerous young ones and work with a



Hey! i am aware wen’t spoke in sometime. How could you be lady?! was actually thinking if you were thinking about studying a lot more about Mary Kay?

117. You watched “Then” making use of the doorway shut as it had been a bisexual episode


118. You snuck peeks of titties through 18+ part of the video store

119. You saw Scrambled Porn Channel on route 99

120. You practiced the heartbreak of being on shopping center and seeing direct partners holding fingers and sensation like this never will be your

121. You have got away with making call at the hall since the teachers don’t wish to be accused of detest crime-ing you

122.  You w

atched “Donnie Darko” with queer art kids and


to adore it to fit right in

The F*CK was with that movie?

123. You had written I <3 **** on your own laptops

Because you had been also frightened to truly write your own crush’s title.

124. You enjoyed “Twilight”

Or felt a smug sense of superiority for hating it.

125. You had crippling anxiety on
National Coming-out Time

126. You actually thought driving a car of god in the event your moms and dads mentioned gay men and women

127. You burnt Dvds with custom playlists for women you’d crushes on

128. You dated a woman with an eating condition

129. You dated a woman whilst having your own personal eating ailment but hers ended up being worse so that you must concentrate on that

Said very long Islanders have actually unacceptable senses of laughter.

130. You wore men’s room


to draw the


131. You seemingly have actually a lot of repressed injury, and you are realizing it as you’re causeing this to be listing

But you cannot end cackling with your best friend the person you survived it all with.

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